5 Simple ways Highly Effective People Build Good Habits
A popular concern a ton of people have been discussing in the Chat Room has been the best habits that highly effective people follow. Before digging deeper into the subject, the first thought that popped into my head was an old book titled, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change.” It was written by Stephen Covey and has sold over 15 million copies around the world. (It’s a must read for anyone who hasn’t touched it yet.)
Using my own experience along with the experience of many successful people such as Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, and Steve Jobs, there were 5 main characteristics that stood out to me. To the average eye, they could easily look past a few simple steps to build good habits.
But for the extremely small population of the world, it presents them with a whole new world of possibilities. For those who never read The 7 Habits of Highly effective People, the short summary is that it’s about the road of success that successful people use on a daily basis that lets them remain champions.
Like you, me, and that weird guy who sits under the bridge, we’re all capable of changing our lives for the best once we build the habits to get us there.
For example, you can spend 10 years eating junk food that’ll eventually hand you a ton of weight. But does that really mean you’re doomed to stay overweight forever? Not at all. All it takes is forming a new habit that defeats the old, and accepting a few changes in your life.
Of course it’s going to take some mental discipline to get there. You can’t eat unhealthy for a decade and expect to lose all that weight within a week. It takes babysteps. In other words, think of success as creating the perfect Thanksgiving Dinner, which requires a little hard work to gather the recipes and ingredients.
1. Don’t Compare Yourself to the rest of the world (it’s too tiring.)
People live most of their lives comparing themselves to others. It normally starts off at a young age and it gets worse as they grow into adults. There’s usually an infinite amount of areas where you might compare yourself to someone else on a daily basis. Whether it’s based on looks, income, or status most people do it in one way or another. But comparing your car to your neighbor’s won’t do nothing more than build resentment towards them and yourself.
Kill this habit by becoming aware of your own success and victories despite how minor they are. You ever passed an exam before? Congratulation! You graduated High School? Awesome! And let’s say you want to break down your success into unique experiences. Did you ask that cute person out or get their number? Great! You did something most people are afraid to do.
The point is this: When you compare yourself to others, you’re stressing your mind out because you end up questioning your own life decisions and abilities. You lose focus to what you should be doing and start a petty competition that never ends.
No one’s perfect and someone will always have something better than you. All you can do is accept it and move on because in actuality, there’s someone else in the world who wish they can be in your shoes. And if you don’t believe me, just volunteer at a local shelter and you’ll suddenly forget those jet skis Bob bought for his family last week. (Freaking Bob…)
2. Party about your Failure and ignore your success
Life is strange towards the aspect of success and failure. Where success makes you feel like the king of the world, failure makes you feel like a rat that lives in the bottom of a trashcan. And as tempting as it is to celebrate your success and victories, a dangerous road people take is believing they’re king of the world. They assume nothing bad can happen to them as others give them compliments, money keeps falling into their pockets, and they’re doing well in their life.
But as you probably already witnessed from either celebrities, entrepreneurs, or your neighbors, success is a toy that can easily break if you don’t take care of it. You don’t have to roll your eyes whenever you pass an exam or achieve a difficult victory, but don’t assume you’ll be set on the happily ever after motion. Never take on the belief that it’s impossible to lose, and whenever you do fail at something, embrace it with open arms and learn from it.
It’ll be awkward and you won’t want to do it at first. I hate hugging my failures with a passion because it’s like lowering my own self-esteem with a torturing device. But the longer you take responsibility for your failures and contemplate on how to make things better, the easier it is to make the necessary changes in your life. After all, you rarely learn anything from a victory than a defeat.
Recommended Read: 5 Ways to Deal with Failure
3. Don’t Expect the World to be given to you
A common belief that’s spread across the globe for many individuals is the right to be entitled. After being given so much throughout their life, they automatically rationalize a belief that can send them towards a dark path. Life isn’t fair. That’s a plain way to say it. There’s someone getting mugged right now while someone else is winning the lottery.
You nor I can’t expect the world to be given to us because our family said we were special or we received good grades in school. The harsh truth is that people will always look at what they could get from you.
Your value is determined based on what others think of you. This doesn’t mean if the whole world think you’re a dirt-bag then it must be true. You can be the nicest person in the world, but that won’t win the love of your life or get you that job.
Respect, admiration, and followers come to you based on what they can possibly get from you. Whether they want your friendship because you’re funny, your love because of the you take care of them, or your time to get work done, everyone’s looking to get something out of you.
And don’t automatically get defensive with this fact because you’re just the same. There’s nothing wrong with trying to get something from another human because it all becomes a trade of value. But when you expect other people to only provide you with their value without giving nothing in return, it makes you selfish.
Successful people don’t become bitter when something doesn’t go their way. They get motivated to take action and change their life. They’re aware others want something from them and will give them even more than expected because that’s what makes other people mark them as amazing people.
Success and happiness aren’t gifts you can receive from others unless you’re willing to give something in return. Nearly anyone, whether they were in show business, an entrepreneur, or a college student succeeded because of their kindness, dedication and giving.
Must Read: Happiness: A Guide to Living a Simple Life
4. Manipulate Your Own Luck to Work In Your Favor
People often speak about the concept of luck and whether it’s a real concept or not. I tend to be iffy about the subject unless I’m taking a test, but I actually discovered there was a way to increase your luck. (And it actually has science in it.)
How? Richard Wiseman, a psychology professor, created a “luck school” to determine if there was a way to increase a person’s luck by simply forcing them to behave in the following manners:
Become more outgoing
Open to new ideas
And to a shocking conclusion, nearly 80 percent of his participants had noticed over a 40% increase in their luck pattern by the end of the session. To give a brief lesson on what Wiseman taught, I’ll list the basic concept to increase your luck:
1. Since your behavior pattern is a prime product to where your luck goes, begin opening your mind to new ideas, experiences, and any opportunity that presents itself to you.
2. Be more accepting of new changes that place you in an uncomfortable position. For me, it’s speaking to other people when I’d rather stay at home watching YouTube. But trying new things can lead you to meeting new people and opening new opportunities that never existed before.
3. No one likes a downer or a party pooper. Lucky people never allow the bad things in life to dictate their emotions and respond to disappointment with an accepting smile. Complaining does nothing for you. Instead, take constructive steps to prevent failure from occurring again in the future.
4. One of Sherlock’s biggest tips was to always follow your intuition. And it’s not because it’s a pretty catchy saying. Most entrepreneurs and leaders said they trusted their intuition when it came to making important decisions in their career and romance.
Oftentimes, people already know the answer to what they should be doing, but allow doubt and fear to get the best of them. For me, I know it’s necessary to get out my house and speak to more people to increase my social skills, but my fear is being rejected. Doubt and fear are the two components that will make you give up. (Especially when you’re taking a test.) Take advantage of what your guts tell you and take action.
5. Forget Motivation. Buy some Drive instead.
Drive is having passion and ambition for long term goals. Drive doesn’t just last for a week or month. It extend for years in order to turn an idea into a reality. While many people thrive to search for motivation, it only takes them so far.
People get the motivation to work out at the gym when they read a fitness magazine, a poster, or someone they saw walking down the street. However, the first signs of difficulty they encounter will cause it to plummet. There are many intelligent people around us, but that doesn’t mean they’ll ever be capable of surpassing you in terms of success and skills.
When you buy Drive, it makes failures not so intimidating when it approaches you. Where a high IQ person will bottle up into a fit of depression because of a recent failure because it conflicts with who they are, those with Drive will try again from a different angle. People with Drive are determined to get their goals completed because they’re willing to fail, be wrong, and overcome their errors. They’re focused on achieving a certain passion and won’t allow the small brittle of life restrain them.
Science still struggle to discover what makes anyone automatically get the Drive they want to achieve a goal because it requires manipulating one’s emotions. You can’t have the Drive to become a Doctor unless you know the exact reason for it. You can’t buy the Drive you want to write a book if you don’t know why you’re doing it.
Drive surpasses logic and reason. Drive reside in your emotions because that’s the source of your passion. One of the methods that has helped highly successful people is experimenting with different interests. Spend a limited time writing, drawing, coding, playing an instrument, or cooking.
Jump from activity to activity and captivate the emotions you receive as you’re doing them. For some it will take less than a week. For others it might take months. But sitting around wondering what your passions are will never help. You need to taste those hobbies and get your hands dirty before you can make a real decision.
But hey, if you’d like some more information regarding the matter: How to Free Yourself from a Limited Belief